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Melinda Clarke is so beautiful, "Pirates Of The Third Reich" should win CSI the Emmy for that reason alone.

I'd been waiting to see Lady Heather again for... well, not long, really -- I never watched the show from the start... but yeah, like a couple of months or so. She's one of my favorite characters (behind Sofia Curtis, because Louise Lombard is my new TV girlfriend, wonky accent and all [sorry, Emily Procter – I just need to see other people right now]), so I was giddy as a school girl when I heard she'd becoming back to CSI. Loved the episode. I get excited when I see that 'Viewers Discretion is Advised' message at the beginning, because you know that means the episode is going to be awesome and that it's going to piss off the Parents Television Council, and that always makes it extra special.

My only complaint is: only 44 minutes long? People! Lady Heather is in the house, you MUST super size it. So yeah, the episode, although great, felt a bit rushed. I wish they'd added more scenes between Grissom and Lady Heather (who become more and more perfect for each other every time they meet - until the writers forget about her and start stringing Sara along again) and I wish they would've explored Dr. JewNazi's motivations more. Also, how come every time Lady H makes an appearance, Sara disappears? It's kinda like the Super Man act. Are they the same woman? The world may never know. Still... seriously, though, how is it possible for Melinda Clarke to be so beautiful? It boggles the mind.

The winter Olympics are upon us again. You can tell because they aren't showing new episodes of CSI. We get no snow here (or winter, or coldness, ever) so honestly, I probably don't even care. I guess I don't understand why we need to have two separate Olympics. Can't we just put them all together in one single big event and just spare us the agony of having to go through reruns? Like, they can finish the swimming event, and then we get a little flash on the screen with the text, "meanwhile, in the Alps," and then we cut to curling or something.

And I don't get most of these events. Curling. What is that? Is that the one where you curl your toes as they heave you down an ice chute at 908 billion miles per hour? I honestly can't watch figure skating, because every time they reveal the skaters' ages I begin to feel really, really bad about myself. Is it me or do these skaters get younger and younger each time? Pretty soon these girls will be winning gold medals in utero.

Talk CSI Files threads

Below are some of the topics currently being discussed at Talk CSI:

- Explore the very dysfunctional relationship between Catherine Willows and her "daddy" Sam Braun in the CSI: Crime Scene Investigation forum.

- In the General CSI Discussion, pizzapie wants to know: how much does a real CSI make?

- And if you are a fan, talk about the Winter Olympics in the Miscellaneous board.

More topics can be found at the Talk CSI!

CSI Files Two Years Ago

Here's what was happening in the fandom two years ago:

• 'CSI' Scores Its First Saturn Nomination
  The series was recognised for the first time by the Academy of Science Fiction, Fantasy and Horror Films in the category of Best Network Television Series.

• Petersen Hints Season 5 Will Be His Last
  William Petersen (Gil Grissom) two years ago began to talk about leaving CSI to do plays in Chicago. "We're just finishing our 81st episode. That's a lot. I'll do CSI until I legally don't have to do it anymore, which I think is at the end of next year. Right now, that's as long as I can forsee doing this show," he said.

• CBS: Petersen To Stay Until 2007
  A week later, the fandom let out a sigh of relief when a CBS spokesperson announced Petersen intends to stay on the show for as long as his contract ties him to it. Petersen's contract binds him to CSI until 2007.

Poll Results

Below are the results of the most recent CSI Files poll:

How would you rate the 'CSI' episode 'Pirates Of The Third Reich'? 9-10 69.6% - (410 Votes) 7-8 11% - (65 Votes) Wasn't able to see it. 5.6% - (33 Votes) 5-6 4.2% - (25 Votes) 1-2 3.3% - (20 Votes) Didn't want to see it. 3% - (18 Votes) 3-4 3% - (18 Votes) Total Votes: 589

,Thanks to everyone who voted! Don't forget to vote on our next poll,

This Week On TV

• Tonight at 10:00pm, CSI: Miami's "Three-Way" will air again on CBS. Here's how the network described it:

  "Three suburban housewives on a girls' weekend in Miami are the prime suspects when the hotel's handsome pool boy is found murdered. When Horatio is tipped off that his team is facing a surprise efficiency review, he must trust Calleigh, Delko and Ryan to work together to find the killer. However, when they independently follow the evidence, each discovers that their analysis points to a different killer."

• CSI: New York returns this week after a brief hiatus with a rerun of "YoungBlood". This is what you can expect from it:

  "After a wealthy middle-aged man is shot at close range in an elevator just outside of his penthouse apartment, Mac and Det. Flack realize that a companion may have witnessed the murder. Their investigation leads Danny and Lindsay into the world of underage high school girls who disguise their age and revel in the Manhattan social scene in order to meet wealthy men. Meanwhile, Stella and Dr. Hawkes investigate the death of a seemingly well-off young man found in a Central Park lake who seems to have two identities."

• And on Thursday night at 9/8c, the CSI episode "Secrets & Flies" will air. If you missed it the first time, here's what you can expect from it:

  "The CSI team uncovers evidence in the investigation of a young mother's suicide that proves that the woman's newborn baby was not her biological child -- in fact, she was still technically a virgin at the time of her death. If the team discovers how the child was conceived, the answer may lead them to a killer. Meanwhile, Grissom is called into court to refute expert witness testimony from a suspected manipulator of evidence."

In addition to the above episodes on CBS, cable channel SpikeTV will of course continue its daily CSI repeats.

Discuss this news item at Talk CSI!
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